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Selasa, 11 Maret 2008

Re: [JournalWriting] Re: File - Check in....Roll Call Jett

One of the greatest gifts we can give one another is the sharing of our stories. Thank you, Jett, for sharing yours. It has touched my heart and I am glad you are soldiering on with life in all its pain and glory.

And welcome, you fit in just fine.

Linda

-----Original Message-----
>From: JETT <jettiam@yahoo.com>
>Sent: Mar 11, 2008 10:54 AM
>To: JournalWriting@yahoogroups.com
>Subject: [JournalWriting] Re: File - Check in....Roll Call
>
>Hello,I joined this group a month or two ago. Never really wanted to
>read anything that was sent out. But as I sit here crying sometimes at
>the screen. I open my email, and start reading, my brain makes my
>fingers click the mouse to do so. I have read almost everything. Never
>really responding to anyone. I even indulged in the email about
>suicide,going against what my inner voice said, to NOT! read that.
>
>I can only tell you how close I was, to doing so.Then I woke up. I
>lost custody of my four beautiful children, I was suburban soccer mom,
>had 2 boys and 2 girls, really well mannered respectful children.. I
>strive for them to be well mannered and have the up most respect for
>others, and for themselves. Those are really the only two things left
>in life that are free. Manners and Respect.
>I won't give out the reason why I lost them but I can tell you its
>every mothers worse nightmare. its still fresh in my heart and i'm not
>ready to open that wound just yet. What does a mother do now? after
>having lost her babies. my heart has lost the reason to live. its hard
>for me to go shopping and hear other children holler out MOMMY. going
>down the aisle with little girl clothes and boys sports gear, teddy
>bears, and race cars I lost everything.
>
>not knowing where they are who has them. if they are ok it makes me
>nuts. I wanted to just stab my self in the heart to get rid of the
>pain. and maybe if I laid in the middle of the street,waited for a
>huge 18 wheeler to do it. To my surprise the devil was pulling my
>right arm and god was on the left arm fighting over me. He wasn't
>giving up and he never let go of that arm. Just then i knew GOD really
>did care, he was there,when I wanted to walk out on to the main
>street, it was him that stopped me. Him that grabbed my sisters
>steering wheel when I drove her car. He knows its not my destiny to
>end it like that.yes HE DOES HAVE A BIGGER PLAN FOR US. Do I know what
>it is? of course not, don't be silly. Imagine, if all of us knew what
>our great plans were, most of us would have them done asking now what?
>
>
>Well I found my spirit again, regained control of my emotions, and use
>my words. I'm in college now taking up the very thing I enjoy the
>most. Writing! expressing oneself with a large array of words is such
>a graceful gift, anyone can have. Emotions are such a great thing in
>our lives as well. We use them to think, we use Emotions to help us
>express humor,anger,love,compassion. Well I now volunteer at a
>homeless center for teenagers. Helping others is what I have always
>been good at, and if I can just reach out to 10 teenage girls in my
>life. I'll be satisfied. p.s. My oldest child just turned 17 on
>Saturday. and she has been emailing me, and calling me just about
>every other day. Dealing with those emotion's will be hard but can be
>done take care everyone until get the urge to write again.
>
>Below is a poem my mother use to recite to me I hope you'll enjoy it.
>
>True Friends are like Diamonds,
>Precious but rare.
>False Friends are like Autumn
>leaves found Everywhere.
>
>
>NOW I CAN FINALLY SAY I JUST DID ROLL CALL.LOL
>
>
>
>www.creativenotebook.com
>Yahoo! Groups Links
>
>
>

Linda in Atlanta

see my blog: http://www.lindathings.blogspot.com
see my work: www.thefiberconnection.com

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